A Glimpse Of Testimony To Come

The Senate Intelligence Committee has made a copy of James Comey’s opening statement available ahead of tomorrow’s hotly anticipated testimony. Of especial interest is a curious statement the president made during his final personal interaction with the FBI director.

On the morning of April 11, the President called me and asked what I had done about his request that I “get out” that he is not personally under investigation. I replied that I had passed his request to the Acting Deputy Attorney General, but I had not heard back. He replied that “the cloud” was getting in the way of his ability to do his job.

At first we thought the cloud might be a metaphor for the cloud of suspicion harrying his administration. Then we recalled the man can barely finish a complete sentence. We entertained the notion that Trump was referring to a computing cloud, but that too was a nonstarter. Several thousand dollars hastily proffered to a private investigator later and we have a definitive answer.

This is the cloud distracting Donnie.

As you can see, the cloud has an unusual shape. Sources inside the White House confirm 45 stares at it through the windows in the Oval Office for 4 to 5 hours a day. It never moves position or changes shape. During meetings with aides, he has been known to interupt the flow of conversation with questions like “Is it following me?” and “I’m not the only one who sees it, right?”

Given its distractive qualities, it may be the ultimate symbol of his presidency.

(Year Zero/Day One Hundred and Thirty-Nine)

Lies, Lies, It’s All Lies

Noted crazy man and nut job James Comey has agreed to spread the Deep State’s insidious lies in an open hearing before Congress. The man was always a venomous snake in the grass, poised to strike and fill Donald Trump’s leg with vile, treasonous poison, the kind there may be no antidote for. Why oh why didn’t anyone think to make a Comey antivenom? This is yet another case of fake news and faux bombshells! The wretched depravity of the globalist media elite knows no limits! We’ve got the guns, now we just need the wall to line the entire staffs – from publishers to newspaper delivery boys – of The New York Times and The Washington Post up against. For America. For our unborn children and our future greatness. For God’s own truth.

At least, that’s what I imagine The Daily Wire’s John Nolte is thinking right now.

(Year Zero/Day One Hundred and Twenty)

The lizards are restless…

Something is happening in Washington today that has the lizards shook.

And Claude Taylor is claiming that the warrants are being served at the Strategic Campaign Group.

Meanwhile the Associated Press is reporting that the Senate Intelligence Committee abruptly left their hearing to meet with Dep. Attorney General Rod Rosenstein.

Something has rustled the lizard’s nesting grounds, and the next few hours should prove to be interesting.

Questions We Have About That Whole Jeff Sessions Situation

Is the Attorney General supposed to be the one enforcing the law or breaking it? Did Jeff skip “Senator Orientation Day” back in the 1990s, where it was explained that perjuring yourself before Congress is a really big deal? Does the Honorable Mr. Sessions hold himself to the same standard he held Bill Clinton to during the Lewinsky scandal?

What did Sessions and Ambassador Sergey Kislyak discuss during these covered up meetings? Is the Deep State holding on to any recordings of them in case the AG refuses to budge? Are there any plans to recuse himself from the Russia investigation, as Republicans are asking him to do? What about resigning, as Democrats are demanding he do?

Does Sessions have anything else he’s hiding? Perhaps a t-shirt that reads in Cyrillic “I love Mother Russia, down with America from the inside like that Frank Sinatra movie”? A nesting doll with Krokodil at its center? A notebook he’s left unguarded in his office at the DoJ he’s labeled “Evil Plan” in careful, easy-to-read handwriting?

How pissed is Donald Trump right now? And if he is pissed, is it a) because of the substance of the deed b) because he got caught or c) because this distracts from the good press he was finally getting?

Where does this leave us? Is the Deep State winning? If they are, are you ready for a crypocracy?